...or something

bah. why do i always like party boys. i'm over it. so freaking over it.

moving... packing... seventh house this year. i'm exhausted.

driving to phoenix to get my new dog tuesday.

hiking all winter sound nice. :)

something in me, or out of me, won't settle right now. the move to seattle, move to folks house in moab, move to wanda's in moab, move to -finally-, my place in moab, is turning into moving rooms in three weeks when third old roommate moves out, and might now be moving to 200 north across town.

my brother and his wife, who i both love and thought were totally solid, well, she's moving out this weekend. jacob is bringing me dakota (the husky i've been coveting since the day they brought her home) in two weeks, if i want her. my roommate nate has a dog and doesn't want another dog in the house. i haven't talked to him yet, but if he says no i guess i'm just gonna move in with amy (really awesome girl, gay, hot, bartender) over on up the road a bit. i kind of really want to. but if he doesn't make me pack up i probably won't. that's the point i'm finally at. if i have to move, i will, no biggie. but i'm in a good enough spot that i don't need to run out the door just cause i see something shinier outside.

although i guess i kind of am, cause dakota is really shiny. :) she's family, and i love her. i'm about to become a two kid family.

belly, meet dakota.

in musical news, i can't stop listening to the moon and antarctica these past few months.

life is fuckin random.

i'm coming back to seattle thursday. and i'm going to bellingham like saturday or sunday. i will be back in moab next week. it's almost dumb how happy this makes me. i am fucking in love with this town.

tonight my dad said to my mom "i think you should do what makes you happy."

i said "ooh oooh say it to me!!"

and he wouldn't!!!!!!!!

oh dear. the stress of the boy i broke up with flaunting his new hoebag in front of my face all the time, combined with hooking up with girlfriend boy, set me up for the flu.

i've been in bed for two days. finally crawling out of my hole. and i have internet in my apartment. woohoo!!

watching true blood. finding new music. eating lots and lots of tom kha soup.

i hate my stupid jewish guilt gene. and whatever gene i have that makes me want something the second i don't have it. i guess that's the human gene.

today i started unpacking and the floodgates opened!! i sat in my room and cried, then i walked to a bar by the train tracks and now here i sit, sadly, happily (i am by the train tracks, after all) thinking of asheville. (i know it sucked most of the time, but some of the time, when i was wish josh, or shitfaced, or in the mountains, or laying in bed with andrew, i really loved it.) *sigh* i need a cigarette.

lots of adventures. check facebook album!

i started packing last night. it made me not be able to sleep. today i sat on my car outside the car fixer place and cried (but just a little). then i gave my perfect bookshelf and bike i've had forever to my friend eloise for her son. i am a sap! no more packing til sunday. it is not time to go quite yet.

my wifey is going to drive to seattle with me!! hooray!!

last day of classes. hooray!

boob project done. sad. :(

have to make a really long drive in a week. it is finally setting in.

two barbeques wednesday. hooray!

saying goodbyes. sad. :(

hmm. there are other things. but i would rather go drink margaritas on muriel's stoop.

i have decided to make the trip with my little cat and my little car and not much else.

option 1 -
rent 16 foot truck from penske, rent car dolly, tow car, maybe kill myself on highway, spend over 1200 bucks, make out with british boy at the hostel.

option 2 -
rent pickup truck from enterprise, sell car, spend 400 bucks, make out with british boy at the hostel.

i'm in serious distress. i fucking love that car.

"hey --
i heard you threw most of my stuff away, i was just wondering if you still have those guitar picks from all the shows i went to and my off by one t-shirt. they really mean a lot to me."

WHAT IS FUCKING MEAN ABOUT THAT EMAIL? NOTHING.

andrew is a fucking psychotic, and emotionally retarded, if he gets *that* and has to run out and tell all my friends about these mean emails i'm sending him.

i'm guessing i'm never getting my picks back.

or dating anyone ever again. my taste is obviously not refined enough for my own good. bad wine gets you drunk. but the hangover isn't worth it.

edit: i thought about it and i get it. he's trying to make people not like me. it's stupid and pathetic. fuck him. find your own friends and stop making shit up. asshole.

today was weird and dramatic and stupid. it's ok now. but man, life.

in other news i found this really hot ( picture ) of me and josh from a few nights ago.

i can't wait for lent to be over. i need some love. but not from this guy.

the moon and venus are suppose to be really pretty tomorrow night.

is it bad that i find getting blackout drunk therapeutic?

probably. but i love my friends. seriously.

you know how i mentioned like a month ago that there's a 13th zodiacal constellation? the sun passes through it between scorpio and sagittarius, and it's called ophiuchus, or the "snake holder".

guess who's a snake holder.

that's right bitches. can't find my horoscope in the paper. this is strangely soothing to me. i like being a mystery.

happy friday the 13th!

at least we get a badass holiday to soften the blow of the stupid one tomorrow.

tonight at the theater we get to dress up as murdered campers. i'm pretty stoked.